Updates, Snow Storms, and Snot

The past few weeks have been stressful, to say the least. I think that’s probably normal, what with a new baby and all. But Ryan’s mom continues to get sicker and sicker, which puts a lot of stress on him, and when he’s stressed, I’m stressed.

Lyric tends to get fussy around 9 at night. That adds to our tension. Being alone all day frustrates me. Like having to wait until she’s asleep to run to the bathroom. Although I do love staring at her face when it’s not screwed up into the "I’m about to scream bloody murder and there’s nothing you can do about it" look.

I still haven’t had any luck getting her to sleep in the co-sleeper. She prefers to nap in her bouncer. I guess it will take time. Soon enough she won’t be interested in cuddling anymore and I’ll miss it.

Breastfeeding is a challenge. I knew it would be. Being the only one that can feed her is tough. Sometimes I feel like I just need a break from the constant sucking. And I can’t get her to take a pacifier no matter what I do. Our pediatrician said it’s fine to supplement formula, so that’s what I’ve been doing, especially when we go out. I don’t mind pumping. Pumping takes no time at all for me, however, breastfeeding can take up to an hour or more before she’s happy. She’s a lot faster when it comes to having a bottle. I may just start pumping and giving her a bottle more often. At least then she’d still be getting my breastmilk.

Ryan has been great at getting us both to calm down. There are times when she starts crying at night when I feel delirious and start crying too, and he takes over. I can’t imagine being a single mother. I give serious credit to those of you who have done it. Doing this alone would probably drive me to the psych ward.

Speaking of mothers, I have to thank both Celti and Aimee here. Celti sent me a bunch of bottles and a cute ornament, and Aimee sent us a beautiful pink wool baby sweater (did you make that? Because if so, that’s amazing). Thank you so much! Lyric is so spoiled already. Good thing she’s too young to realize it yet.

The best news I’ve gotten all week is that Ryan’s last day of work is today. That means he’ll be home with us tomorrow, and that makes me incredibly happy. It’s not that I mind being here with the baby, it’s just incredibly lonely at times. And we’re supposed to get a snow storm tomorrow night. I love snow storms when I don’t have to go anywhere.

My most motherly moment this week happened yesterday, when I had to suck snot out of my baby’s nose using one of those sucky ball things. It didn’t quite come out the whole way, so I had to pick her nose for her. Awesome.